Mizerable
by Ivory-Bride
Summary: A sad little songfic about Frodo's feelings for Sam. Goes to Gackt's "Mizerable" ...Unrequited love, angsty tears, and all that good stuff. *Warning: Slash*


A/N: Here I am with a sad little Frodo/Sam fic. I wanted to write a song fic, so I did, and the song was rather sad, so I decided to write an angst/drama sort of thing. I need some practice at angst. This isn't quite angsty enough as I had wanted it to be. I usually write fluff, so this was quite a change for me. I might do a sequel, if people want one. Or if I just feel like it. Should I do a sequel? Please, oh please review, and tell me what you think! 

Oh! Before I forget, I chose a snapdragon for Sam to be planting because snapdragons are a symbol of refusal. Just a cool little thing.

Mizerable- Gackt

  Disclaimer: 

            Wow, if I did own The Lord of the Rings… I would be quite happy and talented … and rich. But I'm not. I don't own Lotr, hence this being on fanfiction.net. . .

            I don't own the song, either. It was written and sung by the god of all J-rock, (Japanese rock music) Gackt. He IS god. If you haven't heard him sing, I demand you download something by him. You WILL convert to Gackt-loving-ism. Now, as for the song. It's called Mizerable. The lyrics are a translation from the original Japanese, and I found it online, so I'm not sure quite how accurate the translation is. Yep. Here you go. . .

_Pretending not to notice,_

_I gazed far outside a small window._

_The voice of an angel fills the sky._

_Embraced by the wind. . ._

I'm staring out the window, watching you in the garden. God, you're beautiful. You're singing to yourself, while parting the soil for the roots of a snapdragon. You never liked to sing in front of other people. You didn't know it, but I would often watch you in the garden, and you sang then. Sometimes just humming, gently, other times singing words. But only to yourself. I smile. You're doing it again, and I am glad, for I love your voice.

_The noise reflected in your eyes._

_You can't hear a thing._

_Now it's just "a trick of sweet time"_

_I whispered to the sky._

            I whisper the words softly, but I am inside, and you can't hear me. A trick of sweet time. Yes. Maybe, in sweet time, you will come to return my feelings, but for now. . . I turn my face away from you, and shield myself with the curtain. You haven't noticed me. I remember when I told you. In sweet time, maybe you'll return my words.

_Around and round…In the time left behind, I am now._

_Les miserables_

_I loved you too much, and you are now on the other side of the wall._

_Laughing softly._

Yes, you laugh. As I turn back to your gentle figure, I see you once more. Your flower tilts awkwardly in the soil, and you cock your head and laugh to yourself. I loved you too much. Oh, too much. I told you how I felt, and you turned your head, averted your eyes. You didn't feel the same, but wanted to be friends. Just friends. 

_My feelings will never reach you. . ._

_I'll put them in a sigh._

            You will never feel the same. I know it now. You love another. Rosie, perhaps? Yes. Rosie. For she can bear your children, and I cannot. She will love you as I do, with but one difference. Her love will be returned, and mine? Mine will not. 

_Bathed in the cold wind_

_Imagining these feelings night after night._

_The melody I hum softly_

_Is etched in time, and disappears._

_I can't forget the sadness that will be._

_I can never go back._

_Even now I can't dye myself with these_

_swaying__ emotions, and my body_

_Is about to break. . ._

            I doubt I will ever forget you. I will love you until the end of time, and beyond. But you will never. . . No, you will never love me. Why would you love me, when you have her? I can't forget. I will never forget my love for you. But we will always be friends. And I will be thinking of you. When you are with her, I will imagine myself in her place. When you stroke her hand, or kiss her cheek, I will imagine myself in her place. But it will not be me. It will never be me. __

_Where can one person's lone sadness go to die out?_

_"I have tomorrow. . ."_

I need somewhere, someone, something. I want you, but I cannot have you. The forbidden fruit is all I desire, but I will never taste its sweet juices, as I will never taste your lips on my own. I have tomorrow. I have tomorrow to hope, to dream, and to whisk away these hopeless feelings that cloud my heart and shield myself from ever loving again. 

_Around and round_

_in__ the time left behind, I am now_

_Les miserables._

_I loved you too much, and you are now on the other side of the wall._

_Laughing softly._

_Les Miserables_

            My thoughts scatter, and my eyes are drawn back to you as a shadow passes over your skin. You look up to the smiling face of your bride. You laugh, and your eyes brighten. Did they ever brighten toward me? You rise and grasp her in your arms. You share a kiss, sweet and tender, and I have to look away.

_Falling deeply into an almost forgotten dream,_

_I am now_

_Les miserables._

_I loved you too much, and you are now on the other side of the wall._

_Laughing softly._

I slump against the wall, as tears pour down my cheeks and stain my velvet cuffs. I wipe them quickly away as I hear you enter. You call my name, and before you turn the corner, I take a deep breath to settle my thoughts. I wear a plaster smile and my eyes are dull as stone. I greet you like this, and you are tricked. You know my feelings, but for now, my plaster smile speaks, and you believe I am happy. Just friends. You nearly carve the plaster into a frown, but I carry it back to its place between my cheeks. I loved you too much, and now that you stand by me, however happy I should be, I am Les Miserables.__


End file.
